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Offline fury

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another failed weekend
« on: June 24, 2009, 08:18:59 PM »

Part 1
sat 20th 1am

The Meeting...

met a chick online a week ago..
(after driving 45minutes to her house)

Fury: hey sup! how've u been? nice dress!
chick:uhh..HI
Fury: (attempts to kiss)
chick:hey! hold on its sprinklin' out here! lets get in the car! (gets in the car)
Fury:(uhmm..ok this burger needs more grillin..not a problem)

The plan
Fury:hey!,so where u wanna go? a bar sounds fine?
chick:sure, lets get something to drink.
(drives 20 mins to the place)
Fury:(talkin to the doorman) Hey sup man,hows the deal here?
Doorman:(grunt voice) "Good evening sir,theres and admission fee of $30 each"
Fury:OK,sounds fine..there.(gives $60 to the doorman)

(we got inside..i let her first so i can check out her ass..1st dissapointment)








Offline fury

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #1 on: June 24, 2009, 08:23:21 PM »
Part 2

The mistake

Fury:so watcha wanna drink? vodka? martini? couple tekila shots?
chick:naaw..srping water for me
Fury:(fuck!).........(orders a bottle of spring water + jack&coke for the man
Bartender:yeah that'll be $38 bro
Fury:sure there,$50
Cashier gives back 2bucks
Fury(fuck she ripped me off!..better not look like a cheapo)...moves along
Fury:hey lets go upstairs (finds a table)
we sat down for a while..and here comes the move
FUry:aproaches and kisses passionately..we start makin out like crazy..it all goes as planned..right?







Offline fury

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #2 on: June 24, 2009, 08:31:58 PM »
part 3

the fail
Fury:hey lets go to the river!
chick:u sure? looks like its about to rain like hell
Fury:naaa..those tv morons never nail a forecast,lets go! (muhaha)
chick:mnn..ok

20 min later..
(starts raining like hell..we got soaked and wet..its fuckin cold too!)
chick:told ya it was gonna rain!!
Fury:yeah..sry,ill make it up to you..lets go to my place
chick:lol,no way man!
Fury:but..but..it'll be fun!,we can watch a movie or something,what do u say?
chick:theres no way..(gigglin)
Fury..mnn..ok so lets hit ur place instead,ill even throw in a massage :P
chick:haha,thats cute..but NO.
FUry:(wtf??) : mnn..alright,so wer soaked,wanna go somewhere else? or just stay here and get the flu?
chick:now..ur pretty funny ant you? actually i need to get some sleep..its been a long day
Fury:ok babe..thats alright with me,we'll meet again next weekend (in ur fuckin dreams u cold ass bitch)
(drives back to her place)







 

Offline fury

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #3 on: June 24, 2009, 08:38:37 PM »
part 4..

the fiasco

chick gets outta the car..slams door
Fury:hey! no kiss goodbye?
chick: (no answer)
Fury:HEY! NO KISS GOODBYE???
chick:drop dead jerk!
Fury:(wtf..did she said jerk??)
chick:slams her door on my reachin hand
Fury:(the motherfuck!! that fuckin hurts!! HEEYYY!!!)

(now its really fuckin pouring like a motherfucker..god is laughin and pissin on me)




*alone in the middle of the street..not a  soul*


Fury:FUUCKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



THE END
« Last Edit: June 24, 2009, 08:45:26 PM by fury »

Offline DinG

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #4 on: June 24, 2009, 08:55:05 PM »
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA... WOW   EPIC FAIL!!!!


WHAT DID U DO IN THE CAR RIDE HOME THAT SHE CALLED U A JERK? :s HOPE U DIDNT TRY TO RAPE HER OR SOMETHING.. BUT EPIC FAIL NONETHELESS!!!




Offline Ban Em All

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #5 on: June 24, 2009, 09:17:13 PM »
ouch. fail man, fail...


MIFIVE

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #6 on: June 24, 2009, 11:04:11 PM »
harsh dude, harsh...

Offline D-MAN

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #7 on: June 25, 2009, 12:05:57 AM »
Wow. That sucks! You should have tried harder to get a little liquor into her... Then you would have gotten something else into her.  ;D

Offline BUTTPIRATE

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #8 on: June 25, 2009, 01:03:40 AM »
and you guys wonder why i dont date women......

Offline zone_trooper

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #9 on: June 25, 2009, 01:18:55 AM »
You want a good fuck,  play hard to get women love that shit. Works for me and I am a ugly bastard.

Offline NWP

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #10 on: June 25, 2009, 06:34:09 AM »
A. Where do you live where it costs thirty bucks to get into a club? and B. Trooper, you are an ugly fuck..lol.

Offline Glox

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #11 on: June 25, 2009, 06:57:28 AM »
And this has been a day in the life of Fury

Offline Shippo

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #12 on: June 25, 2009, 08:12:10 AM »
And I thought my posts on the forum were bad.  Keep trying man.

Offline fury

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #13 on: June 25, 2009, 04:36:04 PM »
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA... WOW   EPIC FAIL!!!!


WHAT DID U DO IN THE CAR RIDE HOME THAT SHE CALLED U A JERK? :s HOPE U DIDNT TRY TO RAPE HER OR SOMETHING.. BUT EPIC FAIL NONETHELESS!!!
yeah i just wanted to share it,no need to go into detail here,(no i didnt try to rape her)..so ill take zones advice and play hard to get..gonna spend a lot more on hookers too but its worth a shot.

either that or marry buttpirate..idk

Offline blah #2

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #14 on: June 25, 2009, 07:42:04 PM »
If you yell surprise first... it isn't rape.


Work                                                                      Home    

Offline Ban Em All

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #15 on: June 25, 2009, 09:34:45 PM »
If you yell surprise first... it isn't rape.
that is 100% true. when you yell surprise. then its just surprise sex. nothin wrong there


Offline Glox

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #16 on: June 26, 2009, 08:03:20 AM »
I think there is a line to marry buttpirate. He has quite the selection.

Offline shadow warrior

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #17 on: June 26, 2009, 02:24:26 PM »
LOL that sucks. She must of looked at your ass and didn't think much of it either.

Offline fury

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #18 on: June 26, 2009, 04:40:33 PM »
LOL that sucks. She must of looked at your ass and didn't think much of it either.
hey,i got tight firm buns!

Offline zone_trooper

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #19 on: June 26, 2009, 07:36:51 PM »
I would believe that if cockpolisher said so!!!!

Offline canadian_bacon

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #20 on: June 26, 2009, 09:35:01 PM »
cock polisher do you put out for 50 cent tequila shots?
I am Bacon, Hear Me Sizzle!


Offline BUTTPIRATE

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #21 on: June 27, 2009, 12:23:45 AM »
hey,i got tight firm buns!

hey,i got tight firm buns!

gonna need a little bit of proof for that accusation

Offline Hands Mechanical

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #22 on: June 27, 2009, 03:03:40 PM »
bitches aint shit but hoes and tricks dont sweat it



Offline canadian_bacon

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #23 on: June 27, 2009, 03:32:49 PM »
lmao cockpolisher... you dont miss anything
I am Bacon, Hear Me Sizzle!


Offline fury

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Re: another failed weekend
« Reply #24 on: June 27, 2009, 05:00:51 PM »
gonna need a little bit of proof for that accusation



 

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